Take a few minutes to think about how far you’re willing to go. Then, set your boundaries for the things you’re not willing to do with someone until marriage.
Be up front about your sexual boundaries with the person you’re dating and ask them about their expectations of you. Might be kind of awkward, but you’ll be thankful for that honesty in the long run.
Have a plan of what you’re going to do when you hang out with your boyfriend/girlfriend. When you leave things to chance, chances are things might sexually go further than you intended.
Try group dates and when you spend time alone, make it in public places like the mall, movies, restaurants, etc. If you end up at home alone with that person, things could heat up pretty quickly.
Have an accountability partner. Tell a friend you trust about the decision you’ve made to stay abstinent and be real with them when they ask you about how you’re doing. Let them challenge you to stay true to your decision.
This is probably the biggest one: Don’t date someone who doesn’t have the same values you do. Simple as that. If you convince yourself to date someone who doesn’t share your values, you will end up feeling sexually pressured by that person and will be strongly tempted to give in.
Keep in mind your dating years are supposed to fun rather than fearful–fearful on an STD, fearful of an unplanned pregnancy, fearful of parents finding out, fearful of losing friends. To avoid the fears and have fun, we invite and challenge you to set boundaries and apply these practical tips for your own well-being.
Because abstinence is not a noun, it’s a verb
Because abstinence is a choice, at any time you can choose to change your sexual habits and become abstinent.
Try to avoid using the term “virgin,” as that word can mean different things for different people. You might have been sexually active in the past, but you you can choose now to become abstinent.
Being abstinent is choosing to live sexually pure now, and to save sex for marriage.